Sometimes when I'm loving these babies, I whisper in their tiny ears . . . "You are my favorite." They don't know that I say it to many of them, and most of the time their sleeping anyway. This is Daniel. (Don-e-el) He is very alert and beautiful. He is in isolation right now because he just arrived at Tutova. They have to be there for 2 weeks before they can be assimilated into the group. I think he thinks no one else lives in his very silent world. He is in a room all alone and doesn't even hear other babies cry. When I discovered him, he was already "conditioned" not to cry, and I decided he was going to get extra special attention.
I wonder sometimes how often or how long a baby will cry before they realize no one is coming, and it gains nothing. These children have learned this brutal truth very early in their little lives and it breaks my heart. When the staff lays a toddler down at naptime and covers him with a blanket, he simply lies down and closes his eyes. The babies are all laid on their backs without blankets. We sometimes arrive after lunch to find one of more of them with a bottle propped and/or that they've spit up most of their bottle, and they are simply lying there waiting for someone to notice. Their little legs are tangled in the bed rails, while toddlers hum and rock in their beds. We realized after our "holiday" weekend, that there is diaper rash and under neck rash once again. We conquered that already last week, but it is back. We know, however, that the staff does the best they can do with the few hands they have. They truly do care, but there just isn't enough time in the day to wash and fold the double cloth diapers of 29 children. (29 children x 6 diaper changes is 174, and then you double it! 348 diapers every day!) There is hardly enough time to cook and prepare 5 meal/snacks a day, and all of the other tasks involved in simply taking care of the basic needs of all of them. The children are divided into three rooms, the mobile's, the non-mobiles, and the toddlers. When there are no volunteers, they are in their assigned rooms. As you can imagine, the toddler room is survival of the fittest, and the others are rooms where children are very good at self-soothing. I can't let myself think about that right now, I do need to sleep tonight to be ready for tomorrow. I posted some new pictures down below. Take a look.
I wonder sometimes how often or how long a baby will cry before they realize no one is coming, and it gains nothing. These children have learned this brutal truth very early in their little lives and it breaks my heart. When the staff lays a toddler down at naptime and covers him with a blanket, he simply lies down and closes his eyes. The babies are all laid on their backs without blankets. We sometimes arrive after lunch to find one of more of them with a bottle propped and/or that they've spit up most of their bottle, and they are simply lying there waiting for someone to notice. Their little legs are tangled in the bed rails, while toddlers hum and rock in their beds. We realized after our "holiday" weekend, that there is diaper rash and under neck rash once again. We conquered that already last week, but it is back. We know, however, that the staff does the best they can do with the few hands they have. They truly do care, but there just isn't enough time in the day to wash and fold the double cloth diapers of 29 children. (29 children x 6 diaper changes is 174, and then you double it! 348 diapers every day!) There is hardly enough time to cook and prepare 5 meal/snacks a day, and all of the other tasks involved in simply taking care of the basic needs of all of them. The children are divided into three rooms, the mobile's, the non-mobiles, and the toddlers. When there are no volunteers, they are in their assigned rooms. As you can imagine, the toddler room is survival of the fittest, and the others are rooms where children are very good at self-soothing. I can't let myself think about that right now, I do need to sleep tonight to be ready for tomorrow. I posted some new pictures down below. Take a look.
